let me guess. long-distance relationship? you spent thanksgiving weekend avoiding your parents' guilt-laced phone calls for not being home while you shagged in a roommate-free apartment? hey, i'm cool with that. but listen, while you are taking the train to the airport, hugging, kissing, giggling, trying not to cry, clocking the woman sitting next to the aisle with a bag everytime you go in for a new hug (and hogging most of the aisle with your huge unnecessary luggage) the rest of us are being jolted back to reality after a lovely long weekend. we're grumpy. and your cooing is not only annoying, but provides a perfect target for our general discontent with this very painful monday morning.
so don't take personal offense to all the nasty sideways glances and rolled eyes directed at you this morning. but do take the hint and say your official kissy-poo good-byes before leaving the apartment, hm?
and ps. if anyone sees me today, please know that when i pulled these socks out of the drawer this morning, they were not purple. they were dark brown. i'm an adult, and i know that purple socks do not even remotely match what i'm wearing today. but know this, that they magically transformed colors at some point between my closet and the courthouse station, which is when i looked down and realized that ... i'm wearing purple socks. (i've tried to work out how this might be the fault of the kissy-poo couple, but it's not really working out.)
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1 comment:
omg you're hilarious. wish i could write blogs like you do.
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